Literally as i sit here i can not wrap my mind around the fact that we could be having baby # 2 any day now, its scary and SO exciting all at once. This pregnancy has flown by and these last weeks i feel like are dwindling fast as well. With Valentines fastly approaching and me working all the time i all of the sudden have found myself saying.."What if this is the last dinner with Easton as an only child" or "maybe i will let you watch T.V. while you eat breakfast today " "or let you do something i normally don't" i know this guilt is normalish..right?! but I'm just starting to feel bad for Easton, worrying about what he will think when we leave him to have the Baby, will he love his brother, will he turn into a crazy person and act out because there is change? the unknown has always scared me but hey..thats the joy in the journey right? right? i will keep telling myself that's the fun part of life! I guess these feelings are some what good because it makes you squeeze him a little harder each day. It has been funny because everyone i mean everyone is always asking me.."are you scared to have them so close" and believe me i have my days where i think oh i can do this..and then usually get put in my place the next day with something that sends me rethinking that statement. But like everything in my life i swear is one big lesson on "Heather you don't and can't plan eveyhting out perfectly, you are not in power" For example back in Julyish i started to have this feeling like i was working too much (Then 3 days a week) i just kept feeling like something was not feeling bad but just not 100 % right. This totally confused me because i LOVE my job and had a great babysitter who would come to my house (what more could i want?) so i started to work two days a week just to see what that would be like and it was great, so i thought that was it 2 days is perfect for me and it seemed Easton and Kay too. But soon i felt the same feeling...i need to be home more. So after discussing this with Kay he was like well whatever you think Hon, it's up to you. Then right as the words "i want to work less" would come out of my mouth i would think but i LOVE working i love my Friends getting out i love it SO WHY DO I FEEL LIKE THIS? i was confused. Well the next month literally my babysitter (and cousin) let me know she was getting another job and could no longer sit for me! and seriously that moment i just felt great like..that's fine!! So i went from 2 days a week every week to just working spiratic nights here and there of holidays and such and it was good, obviously i loved being home with Easton more and getting to play and hangout with him all day long! it was wonderful..is wonderful. Soon after that we decided soon we would want #2 and just thinking about it i swear..we were pregnant. so the more i thought about it the more i thought this is right where i need to be. Although there are still days come back from work and wish SO badly that i could still work..i crave it! i crave the excitement the achievement, the fast pace and just fast moving. It's hard to explain but i guess the reason why i am saying all this is although i miss work and the people i work with terribly and now i may not understand why i am so torn over this whole working thing i know and feel like this is where i am supposed to be now. being a Mom. and i feel blessed to have the option too. I miss work when i am home but when I'm at work i miss Easton, no in between. so like all other cases i have in life, i just need to listen to the prompting i get and although i don't understand them now..do it because that's whats best for me and our family. I still feel like Easton is a baby some days and than others he seems huge! he say so many words and funny things! favorite word by far has to be "GO" or "oh WOW" "wow" "oh" "Noooo" SO funny! loves toy story, baths, brushing his teeth, his froggy (no longer has a bink at night we took it away two months ago and it wasn't even that bad) LOVE LOVE LOVES reading and books!!, loves anything that runs and Will make the noise for you, knows all his animals and sounds, loves to "ride" dad , walk down the stairs like adults do, and slide down the stairs on his belly. Loves to say "Mom" "Dad" "Dal or Dallee" for Dally, loves to be outside still even when cold. is so dang smart and knows some letters and numbers, how to show one and two fingers, knows what he wants and is constantly hungry i swear! Eats everything! Loves Watermelon, meat, rice, bananas, apples, popcorn, and your water! you know how to turn on the T.V. little stink, and loves to help anyways he can and copy or follow us! Loves and reminds us to pray! you fold your arms and sneakily peek at us the whole time..then need a high five afterwards! your hair is getting long and almost all your molars are now in! i think like four more teeth is all maybe more. you all of the sudden have some attitude and know what you want and when! we just love you so much Easton and you make us laugh so hard everyday! love your kisses, Eskimo kisses, hugs, and cheesy grin! i love being your Mom and feel SO lucky to have you little dude!Wow i was not expecting to write all that, this was supposed to be about this new little guy coming. 38 WEEKS!!! it is super crazy that it is here!!! last week was my big 36 Week final ultrasound! we got to see your little hands and feet, that are not so little anymore! you are now 6 1/2 lbs!!! 70 % for your age! we think you are going to be tall and skinny just like your big bro was. Easton was the exact same weight at this point, which is funny because i feel SO much bigger time around and measure a few inches bigger too. Everything looked great! you have been head down for over a month now and just growing growing. your heart beat as always was perfect and we go the cutest little video of you moving your hands (not much room for much else)Blood pressure still good on Moms end too. Dr. Spencer checked me and i was 2 cen. and little over 80% effaced (i knew something was coming along). Crazy i was looking back at Easton pregnancy journal and really these pregnancy's are almost the same! at 36 weeks with Easton i was 80% effaced and not dilated at all. So i mean you never know with this having babies business if that even means if they will come early or not. at my 37 week app. Dr. Spencer said any day now! "do you want to schedule something" meaning and induction i laughed and said my work would literally kill me if i was like oh yeah i scheduled to get induced just because! Plus i am a firm believer in they will come when they are ready to come! and i am excited/nervous to see what pre labor feels like (since i was induced before) and if i go early or late, fast or slow all of that will be so interesting to see. so we told him no that we would just wait it out. Everyone at work has been so funny saying my water will break on valentines day at work and how funny that would be, as for me i hope he comes around the 18th then my Mom will be here my Dad will be soon (he only has one week he can be here) so no pressure there but i want a baby to show him when he is here. Kay thinks around the 20th so we will see!? Working has been fun, not feeling bad at all just sore, tired feet when i get home..and a tad swollen too! I feel like i am so much bigger this time around, but everyone says not?! With Easton i had the worst leg cramps and thankfully this time around i have not gotten those but i have had a nerve getting pushed on in my right leg that zings to my foot every once and a while and about scars the crap out of me! I have same as Easton craved cold water or drinks and sandwiched, but this time around more sweets and cady which i don't normally eat a ton of so thats been funny. I have had energy for the most part except once i hit 37 weeks not sure if it is because I'm working everyday now or that i am nearing the end but i am tired around 12;30 1 when i lay Easton down i can barley keep my eyes open! haven't had much heart burn maybe a couple of times is all, and the only really hard thing now is sleeping waking up 5,6, times a night to pee and then trying to go back asleep. Also last week i started waking up with my hips hurting Doc says its because that babe is so low down there! but a pillow between my legs seems to help..so i can't complain! your kicks wake me up often yet seem to be less forceful that Easton's were. You gets hiccups often!! so funny to feel! and your just like your Brother was you choose one side and lay sqooshed on wither the right or left side, makes my belly look weird and crazy and is super uncomfortable for me!! but you both loved it! funny. I have been getting braxton hicks but not ones i feel cramping just tightening in my belly that is uncomfortable. your Dad just wants you here! (he hates this part so close but still waiting) You are still nameless and this time around we have over 20 names!! we need to narrow them ASAP! problem is Dad likes his ten and me mine and we don't love each others! ha we will see you and it will come to us i am sure! getting a few foot cramps due to hormones..ouch hate those. Kay is Sweet and rubs my chubby little ankles and Shaun gave me a pedicure and foot rub! Last week i cleaned the WHOLE house like deep cleaned it it felt great to get all this stuff off my baby to do list but the next day i felt like i had been hit by a train! ha ha Got my nails done for the first time, hair cut and dyed. I'm feeling good. My right rib has been aching lately too not sure if it is becasue 2nd babies never drop so your still in my ribs or what but ..ouch!We got our taxes done already!! yes in Feb! crazy yeah we have been super productive..loving it. I cleaned out every corner of our house and de-junked and sold a ton of stuff online and made some money so we got a new Sweet BOB stroller..SO nice you and Easton are going to love it! got a killer deal on KSL! i feel like you are going to look just like Easton and Kay thins body the same face and hair different!? we will see! i think you will be around 8lbs 2 oz Dad says 8lbs even. Everyhting is ready for your arrival and we can not wait to meet you little guy! i know your Big brother is going to just LOVE you and us too! we already love you so much! Bags are pack and ready..here is hoping you stay in past Valentines day!! Dad is taking me out Saturday for our Valentines date!! wahoo! oh belly feeling SO tight and my belly button is completely flat! Chasing your Brother around is getting harder! i am so excited!!!!
see you soon buddy!
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